The Deranged Wish Game

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The Deranged Wish Game

Postby Six Feet on Fri Aug 18, 2006 7:45 pm

Ok, I saw this game on the KoL forums and I thought it would be fun to play here. So lets start. Someone says a wish, such as. 'I wish for world peace' and then the person below grants it, but does something to break it, such as 'There is peace in the world, but a comit hits the earth and kills everyone' Pretty simple.

I wish to be rich
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Postby Slashor on Fri Aug 18, 2006 10:36 pm

... but you become a South American drug lorg.

I wish I was awesome at sports and was in the USian NBA.
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Postby YaYaMcG on Sat Aug 19, 2006 2:30 am

You are in the NBA but you are on the Philadelphia 76ers.

I wish I never had to work again.
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Postby Wiggin on Sat Aug 19, 2006 4:15 am

You never have to work again, but you end up looking like your avatar.

I wish I were brutally tortured.
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Postby PimpingWolfwood on Sat Aug 19, 2006 4:32 am

Wish granted, with needles and pincers. (Ha!)

I wish for a Subway turkey samwich. With bacon.
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Postby Xarous on Sat Aug 19, 2006 5:10 am

Granted:

But it is 20 years old.




I wish I was a teapot, short and stout.
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Postby Six Feet on Sat Aug 19, 2006 6:03 am

Granted. You are a teapot, but your spout is broken

I wish I had a time machine
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Postby Xarous on Sat Aug 19, 2006 1:51 pm

Granted:


But you do not know how to use it and it is broken!




I wish I had YaYaMcG living next door.
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Postby Tagliatelle on Sat Aug 19, 2006 5:43 pm

Granted. But Hannibal Lecter is your neighbour the other side. He licks his lips every time he passes you on the streets.

I wish I had no need for sleep.
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Postby Alhanna on Sat Aug 19, 2006 8:41 pm

We can that - but Now you hallucinate all the time

I wish I could go to KoL Con 3
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Postby Imon on Sat Aug 19, 2006 11:56 pm

you can, but you end up working at the day care center.

I wish i had delicious food for me to eat.
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Postby Octavia the Barber on Sun Aug 20, 2006 1:35 am

Granted:

You receive 30 moldy tacos to eat.

I wish it was easy to quit smoking :)
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Postby Xarous on Sun Aug 20, 2006 2:34 am

Granted but you still die of cancer.



I wish I could wake up and all this was just a dream.
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Postby PimpingWolfwood on Sun Aug 20, 2006 5:04 pm

Granted, but the real world is ruled by machines and you realize that your entire life has been spent as a battery or something stupid like that.

I wish Stabbing Westward would get back together.
:cry:
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Postby Wiggin on Sun Aug 20, 2006 9:25 pm

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

They do, but renamed as healing eastward. Plus they now sing bluegrass.


I wish I had a better job.
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Postby Imon on Sun Aug 20, 2006 9:57 pm

you are now a hooker. you get 100 dollars an hour for giving fat dudes head.

I wish for wishes.
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Postby Xarous on Sun Aug 20, 2006 11:07 pm

Granted....


But now you do not get them granted. PWNED!






I wish people would just love me for who am I and not for my huge man-member...
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Postby Imon on Mon Aug 21, 2006 12:00 am

they love you for who you are, and from lack of use your "huge man-member" becomes a small member.

I wish for a dollar.
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Postby Xarous on Mon Aug 21, 2006 12:14 am

Granted:


But it soon blows out of you hand and down into the abyss of hell....and you dive down to get it, and get eaten buy a huge fat demon, aka SPN's mom, and you phail at life, and the after-life. What a bitch, huh?



I wish I was funny.
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Postby PimpingWolfwood on Mon Aug 21, 2006 12:35 am

Granted, but you pick up 73 male stalkers in their late fifties.

I wish I had a lovely bunch of coconuts sitting in a row.
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Postby Fysk on Mon Aug 21, 2006 8:24 am

Granted. But they're stolen by pairs of African swallows who carry them off on lines of creeper.

I wish for a fish
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Postby Xarous on Mon Aug 21, 2006 2:40 pm

Fysk wrote:Granted. But they're stolen by pairs of African swallows who carry them off on lines of creeper.

I wish for a fish


Granted


But it is fossilized.



I wish I had a good cup of coffee right now...
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Postby Mizzkyttie on Mon Aug 21, 2006 5:32 pm

You get a good cup of coffee, but the creamer's rancid, there's no sugar, and then a cockroach runs straight into the cup and takes a hot bath.

I wish my cat would get off of my desk.
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Postby Octavia the Barber on Mon Aug 21, 2006 7:01 pm

Granted, but your cat slips on a banana peel as she jumps down and breaks her leg.

I wish I wasn't at work
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Postby Xarous on Mon Aug 21, 2006 8:44 pm

Granted:

You are not at your work, but rather at mine, while I sit at home drinking a Grey Goose Martini with a nice olive in it.




I wish I had wings and could soar through your window at night and watch you sleep......(creepy, huh?)
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Postby Mizzkyttie on Tue Aug 22, 2006 1:01 am

You soar through my window and watch me sleep, but get caught in the ceiling fan and must be extracted by a Fire & Rescue team, which results in you being arrested for breaking and entering.

I wish that this headache I've had for three effing days would go away.
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Postby Imon on Tue Aug 22, 2006 8:30 pm

it goes away, cause you overdose on tylenol.

I wish for sharp things.
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Postby PimpingWolfwood on Tue Aug 22, 2006 8:39 pm

Sorry, wish not granted. Because you are white.

I wish for a pet hot-girl.
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Postby Fysk on Wed Aug 23, 2006 9:32 am

Granted. You are lucky to escape with second degree burns.

I wish for a doomsday device of my very own.
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Postby Mizzkyttie on Wed Aug 23, 2006 3:17 pm

Granted, but then it's disabled in a ridiculously easy way by a James-Bond style superspy.

I wish I had a new digital camera, since mine's broken.
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Postby PimpingWolfwood on Wed Aug 23, 2006 9:19 pm

Granted, but it is defective and you lose the warrenty and receipt.

I wish I had a pet chimp.
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Postby Xarous on Wed Aug 23, 2006 10:57 pm

Granted


But he humps your leg everyday non stop, and humps your face while you sleep.

(unless that is what you wanted you sick-o)



I wish I could see my ear canal.
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Postby Mizzkyttie on Thu Aug 24, 2006 4:31 pm

You wake up with a strange affliction - your eyes are turned backwards in your head and tilted so that all you can see is the inner workings of your noggin, including your ear canal. The doctors say that there's nothing they can do for you. Since you can't work a regular job, you join the circus side show as "The Backwards-Eyed Man."

I wish my son would stop being such a pest this morning.
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Postby Xarous on Thu Aug 24, 2006 11:14 pm

Granted

But you husband becomes a worst pest!

I wish this game would end.
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Postby PimpingWolfwood on Fri Aug 25, 2006 2:42 pm

Granted, but it starts back up again 15 seconds later.

I wish someone would fly the the moon and prove it was made of cheese, once a for all.
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Postby Tibbiara on Fri Aug 25, 2006 8:29 pm

Granted, but then the moon explodes and you're stuck trying to get cheese from meatsink auctions for the rest of time.

I wish that Pluto was still a planet.
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Postby Imon on Fri Aug 25, 2006 8:59 pm

Pluto is indeed a planet. it grows in size until it crashes into that planet that its near, cause them to careen out of orbit. a chuck of pluto crashes into your house, kill all that you love.

I wish for delicious ice. space ice!
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Postby Mizzkyttie on Sat Aug 26, 2006 6:50 am

You get the delicious space ice - on a waffle cone, no less! But it turns out to be highly radioactive. You die a horrible, radioactive-poisoned death, but you do so with a smile. Damn, that was some tasty stuff.

I wish that my life were a whole helluvalot less stressful.
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Postby Xarous on Sat Aug 26, 2006 12:59 pm

Granted


But then you die.



I wish I was a cheese sandwich.
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Postby scheijan on Sat Aug 26, 2006 5:17 pm

Granted.

But you are eaten by an ugly guy wearing a shirt with the following sentence on it: "Eat more cheese sandwich!"

I wish Murphy was wrong.
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Postby Wiggin on Wed Aug 30, 2006 3:04 am

Granted, but murphy is wrong. Sadly though you don't know who Murphy is.


I wish for hands that would catch a football.
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Postby Xarous on Wed Aug 30, 2006 3:31 pm

Granted


But they are all bleeding and such, then the cops come to look for you because Jerry Rice wanted his hands back, I mean, WTF, what an indian giver.




I whis i cuokld tyop.
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Postby Wiggin on Wed Aug 30, 2006 7:44 pm

You could, but you dont own a keyboard. Sorry.


I wish I had a 9th period study hall.
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Postby Xarous on Thu Aug 31, 2006 1:06 am

Granted


But it was always 9th period study hall, in hell.



I wish I was a baller, yo.
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Postby Wiggin on Thu Aug 31, 2006 3:28 am

Granted
but you have trould pronouncing your w's and r's

Wish for the old peak back.
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Postby melonmuncher on Thu Aug 31, 2006 3:37 am

Granted but then Jick goes ahead and changes the town to mess with your whole confort zone

I wish I had my own car...
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Postby Wiggin on Thu Aug 31, 2006 3:53 am

Granted
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I wish I had a higher tolerance for pain.
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Postby melonmuncher on Thu Aug 31, 2006 3:57 am

Granted

But scientists are fascinated with your amazing tolerance to pain so your stuck in a government lab for the rest of your life...

I wish my gfs mom wasnt such a bitch at times... :?
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Postby PimpingWolfwood on Thu Aug 31, 2006 11:09 am

Granted. Your girlfriend's starts hitting on you constantly, and your girlfriend dumps you. You marry her mom. She helps you with your homework and bakes you cookies daily.


I wish I could go invisable. Like... Invisable man. Or woman.
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Postby Wiggin on Thu Aug 31, 2006 2:59 pm

You can, but you can't controll the length of time you are invisible.


I wish my hands weren't really cold right now.
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